Game on!

Well, it appears we will continue in our paper trail until the judge is satisfied enough to give us a court date. This could be tomorrow, this could be in 2 months. We really have no clue as this is "uncharted territory." Today has been a roller coaster of emotion! But at the end of the day here is what I'm taking away...

~God IS faithful...and as a reminder in my moment of weakness HE played Never Once by Matt Redman (see my previous post if you've never heard it) on the radio. Instead of just balling my eyes out...I was laughing through my tears. I was sad and disappointed but so comforted by the reminder through a song I literally couldn't stop laughing and told God out loud "Ok I get it. You're here. This is Your plan." 

~We will not give up. Beyond the seemingly endless paper trail in our near future there are other details, "what if's" and possibilities that come into play that I can't get into on this blog that will also affect the future of our process. But regardless of the challenges that we may face the bottom line is if Carsyn or Sara Kate were stuck in an orphanage half way around the world, we would do everything we possibly could to bring them home. It is no different for our son! We said in the very beginning we would "walk until we can't walk anymore." The path is still wide open, it's just becoming more of a hike than we anticipated :)

~Change my prayer. I've been praying for our process, for Levi, for us but I am not praying for the judge. To be honest since we found out about her in December when the initial "issue" arose I've had a hard heart towards her but I've also felt a nagging to somehow "reach" her for His glory that I've been flat out ignoring because of my frustration. I have no idea who she is, what she believes or anything else about her but until today she wasn't on my list of "people I like." Well, as a believer I'm suppose to love her and I've felt a strong sense to be praying for her, and not in relation to how she affects us. I'll be praying for our judge until we see her face to face. Maybe it's through prayer that we will "reach" her...because I really can't think of any other way we possibly could :) 

And finally....

~Never challenge Satan out loud! After the first phone call I received today with the news that there was more documentation to be chased down I was ok. I cried with disappointment but was really able to trust God's sovereignty over the situation. I guess I must have gotten a little cocky because I sent out a text to several of my "prayer girls" saying "...if this was easy I might wonder if it was right but obviously we are in God's will or the devil wouldn't want us to give up. He is messin' with the wrong momma! Ya'll pray, I'm trusting God will be glorified through our delay. What's a few months compared to eternity? :)" It's like I said "Game ON" and Satan replied "alrighty then!!!" Well, it wasn't 2 hours later, after more disturbing news, I was wondering if we should continue in this process at all! I was feeling defeated and ready to give up! I can't believe  Satan took my challenge so quickly:) I had just said that's what he wanted and I refused to let him win...wow I'M SO WEAK! Luckily, God intervened and reminded me this adoption is for His glory and for Levi. The inconvenience, additional cost, and frustration is very minor in comparison to the whole story! But I will never chance a verbal challenge against Satan again...I think I'll leave that battle to God :)

Please continue to pray for us daily. If you see me running around like a crazy person, just know I'm trying to accomplish the near impossible in a very short time frame :) Pray for our family, pray for Levi, pray for a speedy court date, pray for no more delays and no additional cost...and pray for an un-named, unknown judge 10 time zones away that her heart will be softened to the love of Christ. 

My favorite verse as a child kept popping in my head today:

Proverbs 3:5-6 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In everything, seek Him and He will direct your paths!" Thankful today for sweet reminders....