baseball paci's and school supplies

So it's that time of year...the first day of school! Well, in our little family, it will be the "first" first day of school. Carsyn starts kindergarten next week. How is that possible? I've read many tearful Facebook posts from my Mississippi friends sharing in my "letting go" anxieties since their "babies" already started school this week. You know, when you were a kid you heard grown-ups say, "they just grow up too fast" and you thought they were crazy. Elementary school seemed like an eternity. But now on the other side, as a "grown up" I totally understand what the adults were talking about. Life really is short and we don't have enough time with our babies...

With this big event looming in our near future, I've found myself ultra nostalgic and "clingy" with my girls. I had a few hours alone today and thought I'd take advantage of the free time to get Carsyn's school supply list knocked out. Today may have not been the best timing to surround myself with the reminder that my "baby" is now a big girl that needs school supplies:) I was already a little emotional because earlier I had received an email I'd been looking forward to for several months now. After countless hours and month's of paperwork, several trips to local government entities, multiple attempts to obtain proper clearances and documents, hundreds of photocopies, a couple meetings with my favorite notary and social worker:) and a morning in Montgomery at the Secretary of  State's office, our file for the adoption is finally complete and on it's way to Russia! This is BIG news. We are one step closer to bringing our boys home. As I walked into Walmart, this good news was on my mind. After finding all of the normal school supplies, I went on to find the items listed that were not in the "school supply" section. One was baby wipes.

I walked through the baby section toward the wipes and noticed the pacifiers...referred to as "paci" by my girls. I stopped. I'm at crossroad right now with Sara Kate. She turned two this summer. We've had a lot going on the past few months. We've made multiple long road trips, we are getting ready to transition her to a "big girl" bed and we are getting ready to add two more children to our family. I haven't felt like now is the best time to take her paci away. However, she is getting older and she is very attached to it. We have lost all of her paci's but one! So, I've decided we aren't buying anymore. Once this one is gone, it's gone. BUT she has chewed a hole in it and I'm afraid she'll chew it off and be very upset during our five hour ride back to Birmingham. So I stared at the cute pink paci's hanging on the shelf debating whether to buy a pack "just in case." Then I caught myself looking at the super cute "boy" paci's that were designed like various balls. There was a baseball and a football paci. My mind wandered to thinking "Oh so cute...I should get these for the boys." AND THEN IT HIT ME...by the time we get them home they will probably be too old to take a paci. We are already missing so much of their little lives. The tears started to flow. And with the reality of how fast Carsyn has grown up so fresh on my heart, another minute away from my babies is just too long. I pray the rest of this adoption will go by quickly so we can love on our baby boys and not waste another minute without them. So if you were at the Ocean Springs Walmart today, that was me...I was the crazy chick bawling on the paci aisle:) 

The moral of this story...enjoy and make good use of the time we have with our babies. Even grown babies. I'm sure my mom and dad agree as they prepare to send my "little" sister Courtney off to the mission field, it doesn't matter how old your child is, it's never easy to let go of your "baby." Whether it's to kindergarten, college, their spouse or to the world to spread the love of Christ. With such a short window of time, we must daily impact our children for His Kingdom...we must daily impact the world. God uses our children to remind us so many things. It's no doubt He uses our babies to show us Psalm 39:4-5  "Lord, remind me how brief my time on earth will be. Remind me that my days are numbered- how fleeting my life is. You have made my life no longer than the width of my hand. My entire lifetime is just a moment to you; at best, each of us is but a breath.” Make the most of every breath...

Here's the evidence of us making the most of our last days of summer:)



Carsyn with our new friend, Irina.





How can something so cute have such an attitude??? :)

For Sara Kate, it's been the "summer of the tutu."

Carsyn is in "bubble heaven"

Just nothing more precious...

"IT IS FINISHED..." :)